I once heard a man tell his wife in a half sneer that her job was to clean his sh*t! It was shocking to hear him say these words. Being the visitor who is expected to mind her own business, I kept watching Sponge Bob while covering their three-year-old son’s ears, pretending to be tickling him, but all the while hoping he had not heard what his ‘adoring’ father had just said. However, what was more shocking was the wife’s calm demeanor. When the husband left, I too excused myself. I was more traumatised than my friend who was the victim in all this.
I agree when they say this is a man’s world. And if all women spoke up about the ordeals they quietly endure, you too would agree. I have seen women play the roles of the perfect hostess at parties, boss in the boardroom, loving mother, and the ever-submissive-eager-to-please wife, and yet life still repays them harshly.
We all know of a woman who despite her husband’s infidelity, still hangs in there not because it is easy but because she has to, if not for anyone else, at least for the children. The female boss who is judged harshly by her male peers not because they are any better, but because, in many people’s rigid minds, a woman has no place in the boardroom.
Sex videos and photo leaks are now an infamous trend in Uganda. Obviously, I do not condone the idea of recording oneself when the freak in you is on the loose, however, do you notice that it is always the woman who suffers? In society’ eyes, the woman should be put to death for appearing in these photos. The man is either applauded or is completely ignored. One might think the woman had sex with a ghost or alone. I have seen men and some women gather in a corner to watch these videos with glee and some strange kind of victory.
If an alien came to planet world, they would think our life is a battle of the sexes, with female species out to be destroyed, insulted, and squashed like a nasty little bug. It is not easy to be a woman. Walking from home to the taxi stage is no mean feat. The man pushing a wheel barrow full of mostly rotten tomatoes also wants to throw a dirty remark at you, usually sex-related. Then in some countries there are ministers who blame women for being raped. Because according to them, they brought it upon themselves. Women are undressed by 21-year-old school dropouts who decide to play traffic police after losing a game of Matatu.
Women, I salute you; You who make the world a better place, you who wake up at 5am every day to get the children ready for school, and the husband for work. You who fight to make a difference in the boardroom, raise children on your own because the man who generously gave of his sperm is too cowardly to look after the offspring. You who put up with lying, cheating and stingy husbands, you who walk through insults from street filth, you who choose to lose jobs because you will not indulge the lustful boss, you who stay faithful to your husbands despite the numerous offers from richer, more charming men, you who realise that sometimes, you have to defy society by walking away from an abusive marriage despite the ridicule that may follow. I salute you! I salute the good and honourable men who make it easier to be a woman. For the side chic, who is busy ruining some poor woman’s marriage, no, I do not salute you!